….I didn’t sleep.

I started to watch A Quiet Place and quickly realized an airplane is not the environment in which to watch a movie whose entire premise revolves around sound and lack thereof. I watched the beginning of Green Book because I was late when I saw it in the theater. And then I went ahead and re-watched 2/3 of A Star Is Born. I saw it in the theater on February 1 with no expectations, loved it, and have been listening to the soundtrack fairly regularly ever since, despite thinking of myself as way too cool to be into country-fried rock, ballad duets, and pop 🤷‍♀️

We landed in Frankfurt more or less on time, around 01:15 body clock time and 10:15 locally. I noticed as I got my bearings that my back did not hurt at. all. YASSS

And so I embarked upon the mindfuck that is FRA.

With 2.75 hours until my last connection to LUX, I was looking forward to using my Priority Pass membership at whichever lounge it qualifies me to access. The Luxx Lounge, the app informed me, was located between concourses B and C. I followed signs that way, but they seemed to lead to the exit. I asked a security guard (everyone here speaks English, which I had already taken for granted before arriving 😬), who confirmed that in order to access the lounge, I would have to exit security.

I didn’t want to kill that much time just sitting at the gate or paying for food and drink that would be free in the lounge, so I went for it. I exited and continued following the signs to B and C, but I ended up at the ticket counters. I asked a documents checker where I was going, and she said to access the lounge requires going all the way outside, through border control, and then it’s another 5-minute walk. WTF.

Now it was almost 11:00, and I didn’t know how long it was going to take to get back through security, so I bailed on the lounge, retraced my steps, and got in the long-ass security line. Sigh.

I didn’t have to take my shoes off, but when I pulled my liquids out, an unmarked bottle gave the agent pause. I had repurposed a travel size saline solution bottle for cleaning solution, since ClearCare doesn’t come in travel size, and had thus removed the label. This happened at WLG last year too; as at that time, it probably helped that I was wearing my glasses.

From getting in the security line to getting through the scanners felt long but only took about 25 minutes. I emerged into duty-free shops and passed through them to get to my A gate.

Oh, what fresh hell is this. Border control! This is an area I would have had to pass through had I gone straight from the Z gate where I landed to my A gate for the connection. Very strange. I waited in line for not very long and was called up to show my passport to a lad with a German accent who I got the feeling was perpetually amused in his job. He smirked his way through a few questions about the purpose of my visit, not in a smug way, more like… “silly Americans”.

I exited the border control area and into… the finishing end of a security area leading into duty-free shops.

Alright, where’s the Cheshire Cat?!

srsly OMGWTFBBQ

This is like a Star Trek episode, I’m sure of it, I just can’t think of which one because I haven’t slept in 28 hours.

Fully expecting to end up back at the border control line, I instead found myself on the way to my gate. Whew.

I reluctantly sat at the gate — because every time I stand up, my tailbone screams at me — and charged my phone while waiting to “board”. I scanned my boarding pass and went down some stairs toward double doors that I thought would open to the gangway to the plane but instead an Airbus was parked just outside the doors. Like.. no curb, just doors -> Airbus. Which was good, because if there was curb to stand on, I would have looked around wondering whether to get on. I don’t like this airport.

The shuttle took us to a plane that felt like it was two miles away (uh, kilometers, I mean). I have probably never been on a quicker flight. Up and down in barely more than half an hour.

LUX went a lot smoother. There was no customs area to go through, and my checked bag was on the belt by the time I reached it. The 29 bus to my Airbnb listing stops just outside the terminal, and I waited less than 10 minutes for the next one. I had researched this and downloaded the ticket app while still at home. I used the airport WiFi to buy a €2 city bus ticket with PayPal, walked across to the stop, activated the two-hour pass, and showed it to the driver when he arrived. Easy peasy.

I used international data to WhatsApp my host to say I was on my way and map the 6-minute walk from the bus stop to the listing in the Bonnevoie neighborhood. I arrived at 15:00, and Kasia greeted me warmly. She offered me water, we chatted a bit, and she showed me to my room. I have a balcony with a city view and my own bathroom. Lurve.

I dropped my bags and, praise the sweet baby jeebus, got horizontal. Aaahhhhhh. And I stretched.

I browsed on my iPad and laptop, mostly looking for a place to eat dinner and trying not to fall asleep. Around 17:00, I was dangerously close to nodding off and not waking back up until 22:00, at which point I would have been hosed for both dinner and good sleep. I made it until 18:00 when nearby restaurants began opening.

I researched Luxembourg food and found a site describing it as “rustic German heartiness, French finesse and a little Iberian flavour thrown in for good measure. When you think of food in Luxembourg, large portions, lots of meat, fish, potatoes, beans, and dashes of cream and wine should come to mind.”

OK, Indian it is.

I walked 4 minutes to Biryani Corner and ordered two veggie samosas, which I devoured, and a vegetable biryani plate, which I barely made a dent in. I hadn’t eaten in about 8 hours, since the breakfast service before landing at FRA, but that was as far as my appetite went. I imagine the long travel has thrown off my body in all ways.

I brought my leftovers back to the listing and found Kasia eating dinner. She introduced me to Zigi, her cat of two years. He’s dirty snow white and has one of those smoosh faces and the hugest, bluest eyes. I held out my hand for him to catch my scent and he let me pet him, which surprised Kasia. I told her I’m a bit of a cat whisperer.

My bathroom’s shower/tub combo is a very deep bathtub, and I decided to soak my sore and worn-out neck muscles (plane sitting, bag carrying). I asked Kasia whether there is a fan or vent in the bathroom that I wasn’t seeing, and she said to just leave the door open. Umm. For privacy, I didn’t want to do that, but I also wanted to respect the house rules, so to speak. Thankfully, I clarified with her that she meant *after* I was done. We both had a good belly laugh over my misunderstanding.

It would have taken about an hour and way too much water to fill the tub, so I ran it to a shallow depth and laid down. I again nearly passed out.. I let myself drift in and out of consciousness for a bit before I stood up and showered.

I closed the automatic roll-down blinds that shut out all daylight. As I hit Publish on these first two posts, it is 21:30 and zzzzzzzz